The 2008 presidential election has hit the high gear, and while baby bumps , Van Halen , and the inevitable patriot pissing contest is in the spotlight now, I am hoping that my fellow Americans will dig through the Hollywood during the debates.  A major issue that will be addressed is America’s dependency on foreign oil (subtext: perverted motives for war(s), foothold in the Middle East, typical greedhead  stuff, etc).  And while $4.50 gas has stomped out the last of the middle class, and the next possible Queen-to-be is in favor of thrashing the earth for a whiff of petroleum, we find it necessary to put a billboard on wheels, gas it up, and drive it around town.  Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you the American Advertising Frankenstein…The Mobile Billboard.

You can't miss our units as they pass by, not to mention that when you pull up behind one of our mobile billboards in traffic it makes the average person think "what is that?" and thus the "mind" takes over and they read the advertisement message in hopes of figuring out why this truck looks so funny! - National Mobile Billboards

Can you “figure out” that moving labyrinth of mystic riddles? I tried, but my “mind” took over and told me, “It’s a frickin’ flatbed truck with a sign.”   

 These rolling advertisements are the pop-up ad in real life, something that as a pedestrian or a driver you are forced to interact with.  This is especially troubling when considering that most of the Mobile Billboards I see are for Miller Lite.  I do not want to grapple with contemplations of hitting the drink on my lunch break, nor am I at ease with knowing someone is getting paid to use $4.50 gas to encourage other drivers to pull over and get a cold one.  

But ignoring these rollerpigs is difficult.  The Mobile Billboard is becoming a part of the branded cityscape.  Some companies snake their trucks through the city on 10-hour shifts, claiming to reach up to 100,000 people per day.  While we may be (un)comfortably numb to the amount of messaging that hits us everyday, most of these advertisements are not contributing to an energy crisis.

They are not spraying exhaust in your daughter’s eyes at the crosswalk.  

Get off the road, Mobile Billboard. You’re distracting me from talking on my cell phone, looking at motionless billboards, reading bumber stickers, texting, looking at the people holding signs…

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